Women produce one egg per month. That’s one chance to get pregnant. Men produce 200 million sperm per day. That’s, well, a LOT of chances to impregnate women. Things are not equal between the sexes when it comes to attraction and pair bonding. They never have been and probably never will be.
As such, women consider different things and use different criteria when selecting a ‘mate’ than men do when they select a woman as a potential partner. This means that when you’re talking to a woman you want to attract, you need to pay close attention to not only what you say and how you say it, but also how you respond to everything the woman says, using your facial expressions, body language and words.
Here’s the general rule. Women want two things from men. First and foremost, they’re initially attracted to a man who is a tribal leader. In other words, the guy must be of fairly high social status. This doesn’t refer to the job he has or the money in his bank account. It means how he behaves. If he’s sure of himself, assertive, easy to talk to and—crucially—the kind of man other men look up to, respect and aspire to be like, then he’s A-OK in the minds of most women.
The high status guy just described is strong and his genes reflect as much. Strong genes mean a better chance of survival. Women want to mix their genes with a man’s strong genes, but they don’t want to be deserted or left for another woman by their strong, high status male. This leads us to the next thing women look for in men: loyalty, protection and security. Once a woman had been impregnated back in our caveman days, she was very vulnerable. She needed security. So women naturally look for the same thing these days.
You want to be a mix of high-status with loyal and dependable.
Now you know this, we can move onto talking about ‘outcome dependency’. A truly high-status male is called high status because he is a leader.
He is the…dare I say it…’alpha male’.
He gets to pick his women and they’ll be only too happy to accept his choice. He isn’t an idiot or arrogant—he’s just high-status.
So, when a man talks to a woman, she’ll subconsciously assess whether he’s high status (and therefore attractive).
One way she does this is by seeing if he’s outcome dependant. This means how much he cares about the conversation he’s having with her and whether or not she likes or feels attracted to him.
You see, when you talk to a woman you want to attract, you need to make it seem like that’s not what you’re primarily trying to do. Otherwise it will look like you’re chasing her, instead of the other way around.
So, how do you make sure you don’t look outcome dependant? Here are some tips:
- When you first start talking to a woman, you don’t know her and you don’t owe her anything. You treat her like you would anyone when meeting them for the first time. You don’t try to be any funnier, more laid back, less laid back…or anything. You’re still your usual friendly self, you just don’t go out of your way to impress or instantly bond with the girl.
- Don’t agree with her just because you want to get along and be on her good side. If you disagree with something she says, you can say so. If she likes a band and starts to tell you about them, don’t say “Oh, yeah! I really like them too” unless you really do. Then, and only then, you could talk about them and show you really have an interest in them. Otherwise, stay neutral.
- As you slowly begin to get to know each other, you can let her in a bit. She’s earned more of your time (and you’ve earned more of hers). Nevertheless, don’t keep grinning or laughing at all of her jokes. Remember, you’re the high-status male here. She is the female in this relationship.
There are a few tips to start you off.
You can also use outcome dependency to check how interested in you and attracted a girl is to you.
While talking to her, look to see how much she is smiling. If she’s smiling even when you’re not saying anything amusing or ‘happy’, she likes you.
But make sure it’s not a plastic smile.
You’ll know whether it’s genuine or not when you look closely. Next, is she nodding a lot? Yes = attraction. Is she finishing your sentences? Yes = she wants to impress you.
The science of attraction and seduction goes on. With the right tools, you can become a total expert at social interaction with women that specifically leads to sexual attraction.