As a ‘pick up artist’ (or just a guy who’s really good at attracting attractive women), you should always be able to use your environment to make your ‘job’ of attracting women easier. Today we’re going to look at this concept in detail.
The way you approach and talk to women varies greatly depending on where you and those women are. If you are at work, you aren’t (or shouldn’t) open and talk to a woman in the same way you’d open and talk in a loud nightclub. You’d look stupid. Likewise, you wouldn’t do the reverse, because women probably wouldn’t hear you—or, if they did, they’d be put off by your lack of energy.
In certain types of venues, you can use the environment in a very special way to massively boost your success with the women in that environment. The best example of this are small venues. A small bar or a fairly small party are perfect. When a venue is small, you can use something called Priming to attract women much faster and more easily than would otherwise be possible if you were in a larger venue, like a nightclub. Here’s how priming goes.
You are in a bar which is made up of three main areas: the pool room, the bar and the seating around the bar, and the outside seating area. You are with two friends. In the pool room, which also contains lots of tables and seats, is a small group of girls. They are sitting near a window at the back. You and your friends enter the pool room and start to play pool. Here you PRIME by showing the girls that you are a high value group of guys. You display strong, confident body language, you speak clearly but not too loudly, you laugh and joke with each other without engaging in one-upmanship, etc. You effectively show the girls WITHOUT directly interacting with them, that you are attractive guys—the kind of guys they’d like to be around. Of course, you can’t control how your friends will act (unless you’re all in on it together), so just focus on doing what you need to do to look high value and attractive. Once you’ve exhibited enough attractive behavior in front of the girls (NEVER EVER show off for them—if they see you doing this, your value will drop through the floor) then you all go through to the bar area to get a drink. A few minutes later, you—alone—walk through the pool room area. It is CRUCIAL that you don’t walk UP to the girls; you instead walk PAST them. It shouldn’t seem like you’ve gone over to them specially to ask them a question. So, walk past them, pause, turn your head but not really your body (like you’re going to carry on walking), and use your opener. “I’m having a discussion with my friends and I gotta get a different person’s opinion on this…because they don’t seem to get it. Do you think a guy who carries an umbrella is weird?” Use whatever opener you like. Once they’ve answered and once you’ve teased them just a little bit, say thanks, smile and GO. End on a really high note, not a stale note. Don’t let the conversation die before you leave. Say thanks, then leave and return to your friends (which is the most real and natural thing to do). Here’s the clever part. Because the venue is small, the women won’t get lost and nor will you group. 10 minutes later, your group can return to the pool room and, as you set up a game, YOU can look at the girls, smile and give a secret thumbs-up to them…like you returned to your friends, gave the new opinions and kind of won the argument. This really bonds you to the girls—you’ll find that half the time they’ll come up to you to find out more about your group, your discussion, and YOU in particular.
That is the power of priming. Without the small venue and therefore the opportunity to prime, in this case you would have needed to open cold and then stay in the group and keep the conversation going. That’s fine—but priming the girls beforehand works so much better. It makes you look truly high value, you get pre-approved by the girls because they’ve seen you from afar, the first time you approach them it’s not a shock because they’d already watched you, the second time you appear it’s like you’re all friends…perfect.