Black Belt Seduction Blog: How to pick-up, attract and seduce women

The only way to meet attractive girls is to actually go out and talk to them. This may sound easy, but for a lot of men, it is nearly impossible to rack up enough confidence to approach a woman he thinks is really hot. Just look around you. How many average Joe’s do you see hanging out with supermodels?

And yet for some men, talking and getting the interest of gorgeous women seem to come naturally. These are your players. They may not be the most good looking, or the richest man in the room, but they possess a certain something, an x-factor if you will, that seems to act like a magnet and attract beautiful women to them effortlessly.

So what’s the secret of these players that allows them to overcome the shyness that paralyzes the average man? This is what this article “How: Overcome Shyness Around Women” will reveal to you.

The first secret is that it all starts in the mind. How we perceive ourselves and our surroundings influences how we act around other people. That’s how powerful belief systems can be. The truth is every man has the potential to be a confident ladies’ man - even the balding, fat guy sitting at the back row. If we believe ourselves to be handsome and charming and to be great around women, then it’s very likely that we will be more confident around them.

If you want to build a positive image of yourself and your charm, you can start by verbalizing it. Often, the more we say it, the more we believe it.

Next, create positive interactions with women to prove to show yourself that you are indeed someone women will find attractive.  You can choose to start small. Start by making eye contact and sharing warm smiles with women that you run into. Next, you probably could offer to open doors or carry heavy objects for women or maybe offer a seat. You may not know it, but these acts of chivalry are things women find flattering. You’ll surely receive warm smiles and a blushing thanks as a reward for your efforts.

Once you see that you really are charming and your really are someone women find attractive, you’ll be more confident around women.

The second thing is to pay attention to how we present ourselves to the world. This is another thing that affects how we view ourselves and how we are perceived by women. Whether we like it or not, we are judged by our appearance - maybe not consciously, but we cannot deny that it influences the first impressions people make of us. We all know that women decide they’re interested in us or not in the first few seconds of meeting us, so you can bet that a lot of that decision happens unconsciously.

What does our appearance tell women unconsciously? Well, for one, it says a lot about our health. If we are attracted to mates who can give our offspring the best chance of survival, then it makes sense that women will want the fittest and healthiest among the available males.

Another thing that our appearances communicate is our social structure. Again, in line with the survival of the fittest theory, the man who has a better chance of survival is one to whom a lot of resources is available, the acknowledged social leader. This is the alpha male.

So be sure to pay attention to how you look.  Like I mentioned earlier, you don’t have to be a male supermodel to pull this off. It’s primarily about observing proper hygiene, wearing clothes that fit well and that show a bit of your personality.

The last secret that I want to share with you in this article has to do with your personality. We all enjoy being around people who love life - people who are interested in something (which may just be one thing or a lot of things) and pursue this interest passionately. And if you want to be successful around women, then this is something you need to cultivate in yourself.

A lot of things happen when you are passionate about something. For one, it distinguishes you from other men who are vying for the attention of gorgeous women. You are not just a pretty face. You are someone who cares about something.

Another thing that it does is it gives you something that you can talk about and share that will come across as sincere (and not just something you put on for show to make women fall for you). This could also be something she’ll look to you for. You’re an expert at something. And in the world of that something, you are an alpha male as a result of your passionate interest.

This third secret is a bit harder to master than the first two, because it’s something that’s very hard to fabricate. What you need to do is discover what it is you love - what it is you are passionate about. And in order to do this, you need to broaden your horizon, step out of your comfort zone, and explore the world around you. The journey promises to be a rewarding one, so I hope you elect to take it.

If you could read women’s minds, it would be all too easy to find out what moves work and how to get the best response from her. While we don’t have access to women’s minds, we do have access to their body language, which is the next best thing. Decoding the attraction signals her body unconsciously sends will help us figure out whether she is attracted to us, too.

There are a lot of signals to watch out for. So be sure to keep your eyes open for these signs:

• Eye contact. Do you catch her stealing glances in your direction? And when you look at her, does she always quickly look away, flushed and embarrassed? This tells you that she definitely finds you interesting. She wants to observe what you are like when you are not looking, but is embarrassed to have you find out just how obsessed she is with you. How often her gaze falls on you is also an indication of how much she likes you. The more often she turns to find where you are, the more attracted she is to you.
• She’s always there in the places you go to. She’s not stalking you. She’s just trying to get herself noticed. If she’s suddenly every where in the places and parties you go to, and you know that it’s not her usual thing to be in some of those places, then you can bet that she’s sending you some pretty strong attraction signals.
• She agrees with everything you say. When a girl likes a guy, she tends to agree with everything he says. This shows in her body language as well. She would always be facing the guy, listening to what he has to say. She’d be nodding often, sometimes repeating or rephrasing what he has just said. If you were to ask her out, she would always say yes, going as far as re-arranging her schedule to accommodate it.
• She stands in your circle of personal space. You know she likes you when she positions herself close to you. When walking, even without touching, she’d be inside your circle of personal space. This gesture tells you that she wants to be closer to you, and she’s ready for your relationship to be more than friendly.
• She plays with her hair and exposes her neck. When you talk to her, does she flip her hair back behind her ear? It means she wants to listen to what you have to say. Does she move her hair back to expose her neck? Drawing attention to her long, slender neck is a sure sign of attraction. This tells you that she wants you to think she’s sexy.
• She enjoys being alone with you. Do you always find yourself spending some alone time with her? It may not be as spontaneous as it seems to be. When a girl likes you, she’ll find a way to get you alone. Maybe she’ll volunteer the two of you to buy snacks for everybody or lure you to the dance floor. However it happens, if you find yourself with her and just her, you can trust that she finds you attractive, too.
• She initiates physical contact. She may not come out and grab your hand, but she’ll be increasing the frequency of friendly skin to skin contact between the two of you. Maybe she’ll be standing close to you so your bodies touch. Or maybe she will sling her arm around yours when you guys are walking together. You will be able to tell if it’s a casual touch of if it means something else by observing how she is with other people. If she’s the type who creates a careful no-contact space between her and her other male friends, then you can be sure her casual touch means a lot more.

When you set off to meet girls, selecting the right location is important. This is because the location can either help you sell yourself or work against you. The primary consideration shouldn’t always be the number of women you can potentially meet, but rather, how you are likely to be perceived when you make your approach given the setting you are in.

Take for example clubs. While there will definitely be a lot of single ladies in clubs, you have to bear in mind that women are conditioned to think that men in clubs are the types who hit on women.

Before you make your approach, you have already been pre-judged as someone who’s only interested in picking up women. Before even uttering your first word, you already have a barrier that you need to overcome.  This is what makes meeting interesting women in clubs more difficult than it should be.

The best places to meet girls are generally places where women do not expect to be hit on. These are places where “sleazy men” do not hang out in. But they’re not so random that you’ll be perceived as a complete stranger. You want to have some way of relating to the girls you’re meeting, so the location you choose should provide you with a lot of options. There are plenty of possible settings. To narrow it down, here are some locations for you to consider:

1.    Weddings - Social gatherings, especially weddings are a great place to meet women. And it also makes it easier to start a conversation – just simply ask her how she is related to the wedding party!  Never underestimate the power of mutual acquaintances. They can give you an edge by helping you appear to be someone who is familiar, who is “safe” to date. And do not underestimate, too, the romantic halo cast by the general mood of a wedding.

2.    Company Symposiums, Trainings or Meetings – Before you do this, make sure that the girl you are approaching isn’t someone you work with closely. This is to avoid any complications if in case the relationship doesn’t work out. Work is a great way to meet women, because having a job generally makes you more attractive to women. The more prestigious your work, the more attractive you are. And within your professional circle, how well you are faring is generally well-known. Given this setting, it will be easier for you to establish your “alpha-ness” or your dominance when approaching women.  

3.    Hobby Clubs – When you have a common hobby or interest, it will be easier for you to strike up a conversation and to appear sincere – because you really enjoy what you’re doing. When you’re in a hobby club, the environment is less toxic and more relaxed because hobbies are activities you engage in at your leisure. This is a great place to meet like minded women who are open to meeting new people.

4.    Gym – The gym is a great place to socialize. In fact, having someone to talk to while exercising is a fun way to make time go faster and to keep yourself motivated in working out (Hint: Propose to become gym buddies and call each other up to help each other stay “compliant” to your fitness routine. This gives you a legitimate pretext to swapping numbers with her). We all know how flattery and giving compliments can soften people up and are actually great openers. The gym provides the perfect setting for using this approach. Next time you hit the gym, why not plant yourself on the treadmill beside a hot girl you dig?

5.    Schools, Campuses, Classes – These are not just places where serious studying happens, but are hotbeds for social interaction as well. So the next time you feel a little social drought when it comes to meeting girls, sign up for a class (acting class, dance class, pottery class, writing class) and meet new faces.

Just remember that when it comes to meeting women, there are many great places to meet girls and they’re usually in places where you might not expect to meet them. So keep your eyes peeled!

If you are shy around women, you’re not alone. Majority of men experience shyness to some degree when they see an attractive woman. Usually, the more attractive the woman is, or the more women there are, the more intensely this shyness tends to be.

Sometimes, we experience shyness to a point where it interferes with our ability to meet and talk to women. This is where it really becomes a problem and a source of frustration. It turns into a vicious cycle wherein every event in which we forgo approaching a woman because of our shyness just makes it harder for us to overcome and eliminate excessive shyness. In the short term, this results in loneliness and contributes to a low self-belief. In the long term, it affects other facets of our life and results to a lower quality of life overall.

Making the decision to overcome shyness is probably one of the easiest to make. After all, what man would not want to be confident around women? However, actually overcoming shyness needs a lot of practice and a lot of courage. If you’ve made a personal decision to stop shyness now, I salute you. To help you along, here are 5 guaranteed ways to help you eliminate excessive shyness.

1.     Put yourself in women’s shoes. It’s no secret that women want to attract men. A majority of women still believe that it’s the men who should be doing the approaching and not the other way around. If you approach women, don’t think that you’re an unwanted distraction. Done properly, women welcome being approached by men.
2.     You can meet women and still be honest. In fact, we discourage lying to women. When you are meeting women and starting a conversation with them, you have to put your best foot forward. This means phrasing words positively to make you look attractive and to show off your best qualities. This is not the same as deceiving them or lying to them. You’re merely presenting yourself in a good way by highlighting the best things about you.
3.     Reflect on your goal for wanting to meet women. Are you out to score a date or a phone number? Is that goal putting a lot of pressure on you and in turn, fueling your shyness around women? Let me reveal to you a secret that all men who are comfortable around women know. And that is, when you go out to meet women, your goal isn’t to score anything. Your goal is to have fun and enjoy their company.
4.     Change your look. Sometimes the root of our shyness lies in our lack of confidence in our appearance and how attractive we appear to women. The easy fix here is to look your best. Invest in a new haircut. Grab a great outfit that flatters your build and shows off your personality.  If you are conscious about something, for example, wearing eye glasses, you might want to think about wearing contact lenses. If you think you look attractive to women, it will definitely make you more comfortable and confident interacting with them.
5.     Start with non-threatening women. The only way you can overcome shyness when talking to women is to actually start talking to women. Accumulating a lot of positive interactions with women will diminish the intensity of your shyness until you completely eliminate it. You can start off by talking to non-threatening women first. Next, you can alternate talking to non-threatening women and really attractive girls. Until finally, you can talk to any girl you want.

For a lot of men, meeting and dating women doesn’t come easy. And it’s no surprise given the amount of obstacles a man needs to overcome in order to be comfortable around attractive women. We have to dodge rejection at every turn, figure out what we’re expected to say or do, and generally put ourselves out to be brutally judged (and risk embarrassing ourselves) by strangers who happen to be attractive women.

And yet, being able to attract women is a necessity for any man to be able to live his life to the fullest.

How to seduce women is not something we’re born with, nor is it something we’re taught - or at least not till now. Seduction training is a systematic and structured program designed to teach men the art of seducing women. Just like martial arts training, this type of training doesn’t just deal with the how of seducing women; perhaps more importantly it deals with the why of it. You’re trained mentally and physically to have the right frame of mind as well as the right moves to be able to seduce any woman you fancy.

Undergoing seduction training offers a lot of benefits for men. Here are some of them:

1.       You learn what you need to, FASTER. Seduction training drastically shortens the time it needs for you to learn what you need to know about seducing women. Why go through the painful process of trial and error when you can learn much faster and so much more comprehensively through seduction training?

2.       You understand women better. It teaches men like you how to relate to women better. That’s your competitive edge above other men. Because you underwent seduction training, you’ll know exactly what women are thinking and you know exactly how you’re going to act around them. No more second guessing. No more rejection.

3.       It’s comprehensive. Seduction training can direct you on the best way to approach and talk to women regardless of the environment. Whether day time or night time, in a supermarket or a night club, find out how to assess the situation, size up the women, and know exactly what’s appropriate to say and do to successfully attract women you like.

4.       It builds confidence. It can massively improve your confidence. Instead of fear, feel excitement whenever you’re around gorgeous women. Instead of the one being judged, be the one doing the judging and the choosing.

5.       It lets men like you be their best selves. No need to avoid social situations. Freely interact with both men and women. Reveal who you really are and be admired for it. Seduction training can guide you on how best to present yourself to magnify the masculine qualities that all women find sexually attractive.

6.       It gives you a more positive outlook on life. The transformation from being viewed as a dork to being admired as a every girl’s prince charming is truly life changing. Suddenly, the possibilities that are open to you seem limitless. As a result, they lead happier and more fulfilling lives.

A lot of women believe in the idea of destiny - that if a man and a woman are meant for each other, the connection would be obvious from the first moment they meet, or at least soon after. This is why chemistry is an important sign that women look for when deciding whether a guy who approaches them is boyfriend material or not.

Supposing you’ve already approached a girl that you like and the girl is showing some positive signs that she might be interested in you, too. How do you make sure you create attraction between the two of you? Fortunately for us, there are several ways that we can help chemistry along. Here are some things you should do:

1.       Tease and flirt. Make sure you keep your interaction with a woman interesting by teasing her and flirting with her every time you get the chance. Being able to maintain a steady banter between the two of you is one sign women look for to check if chemistry exists.

2.       Gradually increase affectionate touching between the two of you. Make it clear to her that you are sexually attracted to her and that you are interested in moving things forward. Pace your progress depending on how fast or how slow she wants to go. How to know if you can make bolder moves? If she reciprocates by touching you back, that’s your cue to go for it.

3.       Kiss her at the first chance an opportunity to do so present itself. If she likes you back, missing the chance to kiss her may make her doubt your intentions — or worse, your compatibility. She will think of a million and one reasons why you’re holding back and hesitating to move things forward. Trust your instinct on this one. If the moment seems right for a kiss, grab it.

4.       Create a private joke that you can share. This is another thing you can do to increase the bond between the two of you. It’s also a good way to create a special connection that you can enjoy even when you are surrounded by other people or separated by miles.

5.       Give her a pet name. Again, another great way to increase the bond is to have a nickname or a pet name for each other. Nothing embarrassing, please. Make sure you choose a name that will flatter her or make her smile — not make her want to run away and hide. Using a pet name will also let other people know that you two have something special going on.

6.       Involve her in activities that you are good at. It’s important that you choose an activity that you’re good at because you want to create a feeling that you’re bringing her into your territory. Her vulnerability will then allow you to “protect” her and take the lead. Women like the feeling of being looked after, which they also attribute to your compatibility.